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Saturday, September 7, 2013

The Fact Poem

I hate poetry, but that doesn't mean I hate utilizing poetic language into my writing.  My writing is infested with flowery language.  For this piece, I used the "Fact Poem" style in which I gather three different random kinds of facts and incorporated them into this poem. The results:
                                                                                    

Winning the Lottery

What were the chances that Slidell would wake up
To see angels dancing with devils
His living room turned into a godly Hollywood party
His TV changed into a live Broadway show
And his endangered rare dog serving him coffee

He was listening to the buzzing radio at his way to work
The mediocre broadcaster yelled
“You have a one-in-six-million chance of dying in a terrorist attack but you have a one-in-three-million chance of dying from a Coke machine falling on top of you”
After a brief interruption, the broadcaster was quickly replaced
Followed by the pledge of allegiance, brought to you by McDonalds and GMC

Slidell’s boss came up to him during his work
He told Slidell to take a vacation
Slidell thought the Bahamas or Hawaii, that relaxing sun of Cancun
He was scared of sharks though
He read in a bruised, crumbled up brochure that
“You’re also 30 times more likely to be killed by lightning and three times more likely to drown at the beach than die from a shark attack”.
 He still didn't want to risk it 
He headed home before the boss came to bother him again

Slidell seeded at 75 mph in a crowded highway in his economic Kia
Everyone from expensive Convertibles to giant pickup Silverados were laughing 
at the thing 
Speeding in a maze of cars, he turned the radio all the way up
The new broadcaster was as crazy as Slidell was
He yelled blasphemy, and other gibberish  
Such as  
“one out of every four people will be in a car accident in their lifetime. Your chances of dying in a car accident are 1 out of every 140 people.”
Slidell’s car crashed, but Slidell crashed a long time ago
He took off running in his uncomfortable dress shoes
While his body laid motionless in the car







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